We are proud to announce that we are starting a new project, the most anticipated of the portable Tales games, Tales of the Tempest!
In the wake of the Japanese release of Tales of Hearts: Reimagination, I came to realize that since ToHR is such a definitive version of Tales of Hearts, with a revamped storyline and impeccable characterization that absolutely blow away the original game in every regard and definitely don’t create gaping plot holes or ruin previously coherent and epic scenes, there is relatively little interest in the original game. So the Tales of Hearts: Translator’s Cut project will continue, but it will be on the back burner, since we now have a new project that we know you Tales fans around the world will be much more excited about: Tales of the Tempest.
Tales of the Tempest is a fresh and modern retelling of the story of the Little Red Riding Hood. Our protagonist, Rubia Natwick, is a boring flower girl picking flowers in her overcast countryside village of Fern when suddenly, a new boy shows up in town–Caius Qualls. He has stunningly good looks and simple yet expensive-looking designer clothes. At first, Rubia and Caius merely trade fleeting glances, but as time goes on, Caius fixes her with lingering stares and professes that she “smells delicious” and that he stays away because he “can’t control himself around her”. Naturally, this leads to Rubia falling head over heels in love with him. This all comes to a head one fine day when the clouds part and sunlight strikes the boy directly, revealing to all his horrible secret–he is a furry. Now with Inquisitors sent by the Church on their trail, Caius and Rubia must flee from those who would seek to tear apart their forbidden union, joined in their quest by a hot ninja chick with a sword, her also-sparkling furry boyfriend, and a blonde.
As you can see, I am using my favorite party, the stunningly attractive furry and the two hot chicks who are into furries. … Actually, when it’s put like that, I have no idea why this would be my favorite party. Maybe I should just use the blonde chick exclusively.
As an aside, I think this is one of the reasons this game is so good:
This guy. This damn guy. He is literally everywhere. Your village just burned down and you are fleeing through the dark forest? Welcome, we sell various items here. The entire Church is on high alert and no one is to get in or out? Shoot, I guess we need to sneak out the–Whoa how the hell did you get here? You’ve entered the gaping maw of a black hole to confront the final boss, protected only by the Goddess Atamoni’s holy magicks that weave a barrier of pure entropy to prevent you from getting torn asunder by the superluminal chaos flux? Welcome, we sell various items here.
Stay tuned for more exciting Tales of the Tempest updates! For those of you who for some reason still want to play the original and clearly inferior version of Tales of Hearts in English, don’t worry, we’ll resume work on Hearts once Tempest is finished. Plus there are ongoing efforts to bring you English Tales from Phantasian Productions, Absolute Zero, the Tales of Graces fantranslation team, and some guys named Nancom or something, so keep your eyes peeled!
April 1, 2013 at 7:21 am | Permalink
Obvious joke is… too obvious XD
April 1, 2013 at 7:42 am | Permalink
W-Wait…what? I thought this was a joke, but I tried the patch anyway because I was curious. AND IT’S REAL?
April 1, 2013 at 9:00 am | Permalink
April 1st guys!!!
April 1, 2013 at 9:36 am | Permalink
Aw man… I was expecting an actual serious post for once.
April 1, 2013 at 9:40 am | Permalink
The sad thing is that most people won’t even download the patch because they think it’s a joke.
Thanks for this!
April 1, 2013 at 10:17 am | Permalink
April fool?
April 1, 2013 at 11:00 am | Permalink
I don’t know what i find funnier, the fact that people wont take you seriously or the fact that the game was actually translated
April 1, 2013 at 11:50 am | Permalink
The joke is that a patch got released… but it’s for one of the worst Tales games out there. Or maybe the joke is Tempest itself?
April 1, 2013 at 11:56 am | Permalink
After reading that readme, I don’t want to play this game…
April 1, 2013 at 2:51 pm | Permalink
Kaji, I would appreciate it if you played Hearts R before you bash it. I haven’t played it but you don’t see me badmouthing it, and you shouldn’t either.
not trying to be rude of course, just saying. 🙂
April 1, 2013 at 2:59 pm | Permalink
I didn’t play it, but I did follow along on Kouli’s playthrough videos on Youtube. I am not joking when I say that they absolutely butchered certain aspects of the story, and other people more or less agree.
That said, it’s not all bad… I think some things really came through better in 3D, and there were plenty of changes that had a neutral or positive overall impact (for example, Galad). It’s just that the negative changes are particularly egregrious and make you wonder what the heck they were thinking when they did it. To give you an idea of the scope we’re talking about here, the entire final third of the game (minus the final dungeon) was completely screwed up to be dramatically and logically incoherent. If you’ve played the game, this is from the volcano to Jackseed, inclusive.
April 1, 2013 at 3:58 pm | Permalink
give me an example please.
April 1, 2013 at 4:33 pm | Permalink
Uh… thanks?
April 1, 2013 at 5:07 pm | Permalink
To avoid posting a wall of spoiler text, I sent you an email to the email address you typed in for your comment.
I also put the email contents into a pastebin if anyone is interested: http://pastebin.com/fUVUGcyt
April 1, 2013 at 7:49 pm | Permalink
Looks like a good game…
Translate this please…
April 1, 2013 at 8:28 pm | Permalink
Even if this is a joke, I hope this one would be translated also 🙂
April 1, 2013 at 8:35 pm | Permalink
That’s by far the worst Tales in existence and I’m pretty sure it will forever be the worst ever. Namdai would have to try pretty hard to screw up that bad again.
April 1, 2013 at 8:43 pm | Permalink
Nice April Fool’s, is a shame but i doubt that someone will translate tempest one day, the game isn’t a very good of the Tales Saga, but isn’t that bad either.
April 1, 2013 at 10:26 pm | Permalink
Absolute Zero released Tempest patch just today. Even for an April Fools joke, I’m still very happy to be able to play this game in English.
April 2, 2013 at 4:33 am | Permalink
Wait, announced and then immediately released by AZ? o_o;
April 2, 2013 at 5:20 am | Permalink
@OLHearts
Just like PP’s Tales of Phantasia! I get it now!
April 2, 2013 at 7:14 am | Permalink
I don’t believe I put more concentration judging your posts than reading books xD .
April 2, 2013 at 8:37 am | Permalink
lol. The patch is real, nice april fools again.
April 2, 2013 at 11:25 am | Permalink
Well, so the patch is real and done. I just can thank you and the rest of the translation staff for the suffering gotten through this adventure 🙂
April 3, 2013 at 3:30 am | Permalink
But Absolute Zero already came out with the patch @_@
April 3, 2013 at 9:22 am | Permalink
Calibri be sick bruzza, your ‘foo not be strong enough for da FOOLS.
Back next year imma wanna be seeing da ace in kajitani-TROLLFACE m’kay?
April 3, 2013 at 10:12 am | Permalink
Absolute Zero may have already released the patch for Tempest, but if you go over and read the post about it. Kaji assisted in the completion of the Tempest patch. So he isn’t actually completely joking about a new project…just that it was finished by the time he announced it. Still, good going KE, and AZ. Cant wait for Hearts, then the DS Tales collection will be complete.
April 3, 2013 at 6:36 pm | Permalink
So… well i want to thank you guys for this “joke”. I have actually been playing it a bit. Its not super by any means, but i did enjoy the initial plot more than the kiddy rucca on innocence. I might actually finish it eventually.
April 4, 2013 at 1:58 pm | Permalink
So I read your e-mail and while I think that you did bring up a lot of good points, I think there’s something we are all forgetting here: these aren’t remakes, they are REIMAGININGS.
like destiny and innocence R, this a new take on the story and it isn’t bound to the originals story. In short, Hearts R isn’t Hearts, It’s Hearts R. The original still exists and so does the the R version so we can look at both as there own entities.
Again not starting a fight, just giving my own 2 cents. have a good day kaji! 🙂
April 4, 2013 at 3:56 pm | Permalink
I do want to start a fight, though 😛
I agree with your premise, but not your implied conclusion. Hearts R is not Hearts. I have no problem with that. But, when I complain about things from Hearts being ruined, I’m not complaining about the fact that things have changed. I’m complaining about the fact that the end result is *bad*. Further, I’m complaining especially hard because it’s so *bad* when the effortless choice of not changing anything would have resulted in something *good*.
I’ll give you another example, this time mostly spoiler-free since it’s from early in the game. In the original game, as you are about to take a break to rest in the forest, Kohaku gets frightened. Shing and Hisui are confused as to what’s wrong, but it turns out that there are tons of monsters nearby. Calcedony pops out to defeat the monsters in a grand showing. He essentially calls Shing and Hisui incompetent and boasts about how awesome he is, being a Velleia Crystal Knights Soma Master, then leaves.
I’ll now tell you the good part about what Hearts R changed. In Hearts R, they changed it so you have Galad with you at this point. Galad is a cool older dude with some experience with his Soma (I think). So it *makes sense* that when the monsters attack, Galad dispatches some of them and Calcedony compliments him on it. Cal still calls Shing and Hisui incompetent as usual, but he has some respect for Galad, while Galad sticks up for his teammates. This is all *internally self-consistent*; they put a character into the situation, and the situation plays out like you would expect it should.
Now I’ll tell you the bad part. Midway through the conversation, another monster suddenly attacks; instead of wolves, it’s a goddamn GRIM REAPER. This monster is immune to Calcedony’s Soma until Galad uses some weird electricity thing on it to render it vulnerable to the party’s attacks (hinting at his weird Triverse connections). It also is completely unlike any other wild monster you ever face in the entire game; most are animals or plants or something (unless they changed this for ToHR, which I doubt). But anyway, you fight the monster and beat it, and afterwards… the conversation resumes as if the monster never showed up. That’s right, the GRIM REAPER shows up, and after beating it, it’s back to the *exact same dialogue* from the DS of Calcedony berating Shing and Hisui and being an awesome Velleia Crystal Knight. To add insult to injury, for all his talk of being some crazy awesome Knight, he sure doesn’t have very impressive stats… http://puu.sh/2tAhs/ed823fb38e
The point is, it does not logically follow. It’s not internally self-consistent. Even if I never played Tales of Hearts, if I saw this scene, I would be like, what the heck? How did we, after beating the GRIM REAPER, who is clearly some kind of special monster that couldn’t even be hurt until Galad did something special to it, get shoved right back to the same flow of dialogue without any segue whatsoever? Not even a “Wow, what the heck was that all about” or “Galad, what did you do to it to make it vulnerable” or “See, as a Crystal Knight I did all the work, you two need to work on your skills”? There is no post-battle acknowledgement that there WAS a battle at all! The fact that there IS a previous point of reference that was already much higher quality makes it worse, but it doesn’t mean that Tales of Hearts R would be *good* in a vacuum. Maybe if you don’t pay attention to the plot or logical flow of the story scenes… :/
April 4, 2013 at 4:53 pm | Permalink
Well, it looks like you got me in a bad spot.
I will admit that these new add ons were poorly handled, but still…. they are add ons, its kind of hard to incorparate them well in a story like this.
still I need to remind you one thing about the story: It aint the entire game. in the end the game is at its heart (ha-ha) a fun RPG with likable characters and a (supposedly) good battle system. I can understand that you’re annoyed by the new badly done descisions in the story but with everything else in the game, how could it ruin the rest of the experience?
I’ll get this and Innocence R in september so hopefully I can tell you how they are. Hopefully Tempest R will do a better job with it’s source material while also enhancing it.
Anyway I have to ask, has Kouli been showing the games skits? How are they?
April 6, 2013 at 11:47 pm | Permalink
dude! i saw it on DICASTIA site and they already release the full translated version of this game!!
April 7, 2013 at 3:51 pm | Permalink
Which game? Tales of Innocence, yeah I’ve seen that one on DICASTIA, but it still hasn’t notified any sort of fan translation of Tempest or Hearts (well, Tempest has one now, but you know… if THERE IS already a fan translated version of Hearts already… then, I really wonder who has worked on it then — but yeah, a hoax).
April 7, 2013 at 9:50 pm | Permalink
Well… that was a nightmare.
As terribly boring, dull, and simplistic as the game is, despite the fact that it was basically a 10.5 hour chore with no real-world payoff, that weird OCD gotta-beat-this-game feeling kicked in and forced me to complete it. I should’ve heeded the advice in the readme. 🙁
At least I know how much the game sucks now though, I guess. All I could think of when the credits rolled was how much it would suck to be someone on that list.
April 7, 2013 at 10:51 pm | Permalink
no i mean the complete translation of tales of tempest game already release on dicastia site
December 13, 2013 at 12:24 pm | Permalink
Why are you translating a new game when you have not finished your last projects? are you dumb? or just stupid?
December 13, 2013 at 12:46 pm | Permalink
@wtf. Tempest is already translated. You must have missed that point. It was a joint project with AZ. Also, since Tempest is so short, it didnt take them very long to Translate it. Why are you even complaining that now only Hearts for the DS remains to be in English. That should be good news if you’re actually a Tales of fan.
April 3, 2021 at 2:06 pm | Permalink
[…] ago, so I’m not really sure what the plot is about other than that it’s the prequel to Tales of the Tempest, explaining how Caius contracted his […]